In 2012 I learned a lot about myself…. I spent time with my best friends, stood up for myself, drank a lot of green tea and/or alcohol, went to some weddings, kissed some guys (and liked it… a lot), danced on a few bars, got close with some amazing new girlfriends, gossiped, vented, got into a fair share of arguments, ate a lot of junk and figured out some things about my life that I’m proud of and not so proud of. So below I’m going to write out some of the things I’m taking with me into 2013. And who knows, maybe it’ll help you in the new year.
** Don’t be friends with your ex.
Before this year I would go back and forth on this argument but now I would like you to know that I wholeheartedly do not believe that exes can be friends. There were many parts of my life that I shared with said ex ((including a dog that I still get depressed about at least once a week)) but I know that the only reason I stayed friends with him is because I wanted him to stay a part of my life not because I value his friendship. After about the fourth time he demolished my heart, I wrote a letter {One that was never responded to… a hole} and decided that no, I don’t value his friendship and I deserve more. So lesson learned – I will not try to maintain a friendship with anymore of my exes.
** Say what’s on your mind.
I know that I am difficult and sometimes impossible to handle. I am obnoxious and I don’t think any man will be able to be with me FOR LIFE [No one can handle my sarcastic personality and overwhelming good looks all the time 😉 HOLLLAA Hubby # 2]. But I think that your honest feelings and words are important enough to share. Especially with your friends. That’s why we are there in each other’s lives… to be open and real and tell each other ish we don’t want to hear.
**Don’t be an idiot – mutual lust is where it’s at.
So a little thing I worked on this year was moving on. You should know this from my previous posts… I have a lot of guys in my life and not all of them are solid relationships – enter “BEN” and that moronic slight obsession– and unrequited lust is not ok. <<SIDENOTE if you haven’t listened to Unrequited Love by Lykke Li… or haven’t listened to any Lykke Li ish you need to get with it because it’s ab fab and goes with this point>> You should be with someone that likes you just as much as you like them… not as much as they can, not just when you guys are alone and not in their own way. That’s all BS. Eff that noise. We have got to like someone that likes us back and we can’t let guys pile on excuses and lies that we let go because they “like” us. Pain happens. It’s ok to be damaged. It is not ok to bring someone into that deep dark hole.
** Have a good core that you can be open about any and EVERYthing with.
Alright, I might be more than a little biased when I say this but my besties really are the most incredible people I know. Some people say that laughter’s the best medicine and I agree about 100% and with my besties it means laughing so hard we cry and our faces hurt from smiling and laughing so much. You have to have someone that will tell you when there’s something in your teeth or when you’re dating a douche… it’s awkward sometimes and upsetting but your best friends care about you and they have your back! There are never any judgments with this core group because with ours more than likely someone’s done it before. They help you open up and bring about a confidence (in me at least) that’s the most important thing in a relationship. So I love you betches and I think I will in fact keep you in the new year.
** My face gives away more than my mouth EVER will.
I don’t know anyone that doesn’t give dirty looks. It’s basically a second language for me seeing as I probably give more looks than I communicate verbally. But it’s like, why waste energy and time talking about our feelings when one look can say it all?? I’ve gotten pretty good at it… a master even… but in 2013, I’m going to tone it down a notch because at some point or another they are going to get me in trouble. — Seriously… it’s coming.
** December is… the month of reflection.
It should come as no shock to anyone that I didn’t keep any of my new year’s resolutions. Any of them. But that’s ok because now I can reflect and come up with some worth upholding for next year. Psych! I’m over that – no more resolutions just a celebration of being amazing! I mean resolutions like lose weight, drink less, etc… these can’t be resolutions if you tell yourself this all year long as you continually do things that do not reinforce them! No one sticks to these things… like ever. But let’s back up, I can’t get ahead of myself… because before Jan. 1 – also known as the first day of failing at said resolutions – is Dec. 31 ((GENIUS)) and I can’t wait to end this fantabulous year with a big fat blackout bang!!! One of my friends [the italics should indicate he’s not anymore – and he sucks] made a toast few years ago on NYE that was and still is the best thing I have ever heard. He said that New Year’s is like the circle of life… starting the new year the same way you were born… not remembering anything! So find your best dress ladies and go out with a bang <pun not intended> because that sounds like the perfect recipe for a fab 2013!
ChangingintheCity 