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Non-Resolution Resolutions

I see the appeal in New Year’s resolutions. We make them out of the desire to better our lives. I get it. Really, I do! Who doesn’t want to be in better shape, richer or travel more? I’m on board… but I have made those resolutions and failed… year after year. I’ve failed because I am a HUGE procrastinator, an excessive shopper and my choices (due to my incredible personality) are normally not that smart… so this is what I have decided. I’m not going to sit here and rattle on with resolutions on how to better my life – due to society’s skewed views – this year… instead I’m looking back on 2012 and taking in what the last 365 days have taught me and I’m going to figure out a way for me to do more things right than wrong this year. I’ve put together a list that will help me to become a(n – even) better person… or at least that’s what I’m hoping.

  • To start with the typical one that will make me a healthier person – working out. Admittedly, I do always feel better after I work out. I like people and life a whole lot more when I’m not sitting on my butt watching reality tv and stuffing my face full of Lay’s potato chips. Working out improves my attitude which in turn makes me a better person… see full circle.
  • Along with the being healthier goal, I’m going to work on my confidence this year. No more looking in the mirror and feeling even the slightest bit of disappointment. This goes for everyone – we are programmed to be hard on ourselves and it’s not necessarily what everyone else is seeing when they look at us – so I’m going to be as generous towards my own reflection as I am towards those of my best friends.
  • No more comparisons. I don’t know if this happens to you guys, but at the end of every year I like to reflect on what I actually accomplished that year. Did I do enough? I mean naturally I compare my year and accomplishments to others but from here on out I’m done comparing my life to others… I am so blessed with a fantastic family and great friends and I have so much therefore I am donezo. No more feeling ungrateful!
  • I’m going to be more accepting of change this year. I’ve learned more than ever this year that this is one of the biggest things that happens in our 20s! My jobs have changed, cities change and friendships change… my outlook on success and love have changed. Some of my closest friends from childhood are changing into parents and my parents have changed into being two of my closest friends. Things are changing all around me at all times – so this year I’m going to be more open to it… it is going to happen whether I like it or not so why not jump on that bandwagon willingly?
  • I know that there will be some days this year when – even though I’m surrounded by people and things that I love – I will feel completely alone. I felt it so many times this past year and I know now that it’s just a glitch. Just a skip in the song that is my life. I understand that life isn’t easy… it’s just that no one really said that it would be this hard. More than a few times this year the hard was a hell of a lot harder than I thought it could be but we can’t go back… we gotta keep going and that’s what I’m doing. Waiting for that song to end and for the next one to begin.
  • Sometimes silence can be amazing. I talk… a whole lot and in 2013 I’m going to do a better job  of just sitting there quietly and listening.[ I’m probably going to learn a crap ton by doing this!]
  • Look at life with a new set of {less critical} eyes. One of my best friends has this amazing trait. She sees goodness… in everyone. I’ve never been one of those people and I admire this in her. So I’m going to give it a go. I’m going to give people the benefit of the doubt and try to be a little bit more optimistic and a little less judgmental. Along with this seeing people in a new light, I’m going to work on forgiveness this year too. 2012 offered me a lot of opportunity to forgive. I’ve found that it’s easy to let your anger and unhappiness just chill inside but I’m not going to let that happen anymore. I’m going to feel it and fix it.
  • Last on this list (but definitely not the last thing I’m going to work on to make myself a better person) is that I want to be more present this year. I get caught up in a lot of crap… often and I ignore things and moments that turn out to be important later on. I guess we never really know what’s important at the time it’s happening so I’m going to try to do a better job of living each moment so I don’t end up taking time or anything else for granted.

Like I said at the beginning, my ultimate goal is to do more things right this year. I do a whole lot of things wrong the first time around and the hope is that it does get better the next time and I am saying with confidence that it will this year.  If I do all I can to better myself or achieve my goals and I succeed… or fail miserably, it’s ok because it’s mine. I’m owning it because I am in control of my own outcome. Right now, is the time of our lives and I have every intention of living it well. So happy happy New Year guys – I can’t wait to see what my resolution-less 2013 will bring!



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